"The history of man during the nine months preceding his birth would probably be much more interesting and contain more momentous events than all the seven decades
following his birth!"
Samuel Taylor Coleridge (1772- 1834)
How, born alone?
A single-born twin/triple is someone who incarnates in twos or threes, but then comes into the world alone, because he usually lost the other half-twin within the first weeks of pregnancy. I myself am a single-born triplet and would like to give you a little insight into this topic of life.
Sadness, feelings of guilt, searching, longing for death, depression up to suicidal thoughts, loneliness and a wide spectrum of fears, the tendency to give better than to be able to accept, as
well as a pronounced helper syndrome, no children, abortion, emptiness, addiction to closeness and fear of closeness, sexual problems, feelings of distance to many people, to the mother, Problems
with identical siblings, mentally BEING somewhere, feeling of loneliness, even in the vicinity of the most familiar people, traveling, feelings of "I am not enough", self-sabotage, feeling lost,
lonely moments and unpleasant sensations in the company of others, but the main thing is not to be alone, are typical characteristics of twins born alone. They suffer - mostly unconsciously -
from the effects of this prenatal separation.
If this early trauma of loss remains unrecognized, it has a lasting and largely destructive effect on all areas of life, as I know from my own experience.
The unconscious search
Every tenth pregnancy has a multiple birth, but still few mothers know about it. The surviving babies suffer a trauma through the death of their sibling(s) that affects them throughout their lives. The difficult thing about the twin story is that it lies dormant so deep in the unconscious. Problems that a person experiences consciously can be worked through more easily.
Relations, Connection, Love
It is difficult for a twin to have a happy and healthy, even normal relationship, as long as they do not know about being born alone. Since they had the other from the first moment of their life,
they develop a strong "we" feeling. At the same time, there is also the subliminal fear of losing their partner again, as they did their brother or sister, and of being hurt.
It is easy for the melting twin to enter into a relationship, but he or she gives himself or herself up in the relationship. The escape twin, on the other hand, disappears as soon as it could become "too" nice. This happens unconsciously.
Love becomes wonderful when the onlyborn is aware of his aloneness. Only then he can live love and is capable of infinitely deep love ability. Without giving up themselves or smothering their partner, they prove to be loving and attentive, are ready and capable of devotion, closeness and can be attentive, passionate and at the same time tender lovers in their strong sensuality.
My recommendation is always to bring the twin theme into the partnership, so that the partner learns to deal with the fact that a single-born sometimes still reacts to old patterns.
Skills and talent
Alone-borns are extremely sensitive, intuitive, sensitive, empathic and attentive, are full of creativity and if they are aware of their helper syndrome and they have learned to say "no" once in
a while when it is appropriate, they make excellent advisors and mediators. Empathy, caring, healing skills are just some of the gifts I have as well. Single-borns are often artistic as well.
Many are well-known musicians who often could not/do not realize to whom they dedicate their music. Leonard Cohen with Suzanne, seems to be one of them. Since I saw Tim Bendzko's music video " Am
seidenen Faden ", I feel that he was born alone.
Their versatility, their high standards and their dedication, when they have freed themselves from their self-sabotage, make them capable of extraordinary performances.