EnjoyLifeAgain

Genieße wieder das Leben

Gingers SeelenOase

A true incident & the beginning of my foot readings.

How, only 25 minutes should I have for this foot reflexology massage? For me that was much too short, because a noticeable physical relaxation set in only after 20 minutes and for the feet 50min were much more effective. Why the girls at the reception had booked only 25min was not so clear to me. Why did they not understand how important it was that I could take enough time for each guest? Well, I would give my best, even at 25min!

Already from a distance I feel the insecurity of this man. His eyes look at me questioningly and shyly. "Hello, I'm Ginger, you have your application with me now." A voice that was almost toneless returned a "hello" on his part.
In me the feeling spread that these 25 minutes would probably be very interesting.

The massage table I had perfectly adjusted and so I could start directly. After my obligatory: " so the massage causes.... " explanation, I naturally wanted to know why he was interested in a foot treatment of only 25 minutes.

"I don't know if it will do me any good now, I've never done a foot reflection massage before. My feet just hurt all the time. If I've been walking for a day, my feet hurt. I have flat feet and have had them for a while. I've tried insoles, but it doesn't get any better." He sounded almost bored as he spoke this way. "On one side they're chronically overworked and where they have the hands now, I always have inflammation that's really swollen and hurts too." As he talked about his feet, he spoke softly and seemed very downcast.

"I guess it's my big belly."
Aha, I thought, and was curious to hear what else he would tell. Touching his feet, I immediately noticed a tremendous tension that grew the more he revealed about himself.
"I always have cramps in my feet, too. Oh yes, and no doctor has found an explanation yet."
My hands felt over his feet during his words, apparently surprised by this new kind of touch. The tension remained persistent. "How long have you had this discomfort?" I hooked.
"You know, for 20 years." he replied, and actually laughed. My mouth remained open. "For 20 years ?" I wasn't sure how genuine his laugh was, and I folded my mouth shut again. It was time to ask questions:
"Tell me, did you change anything completely in your life 20 years ago? Did you move, go somewhere else, where today you think, oops, would I have chosen differently back then?"
He looked at me.

"Hmm, there is such a thing, isn't there? I've had an extremely stressful life." That wasn't it yet, I heard myself think, and asked if there might be a more concrete memory? His brow furrowed and it felt like forever before he finally seemed to remember.
"Hmm, yeah maybe they're right."
I waited. Well, said his despondent eyes, do they know more? I felt that step by step I was helping him to a new perspective. The questions I would ask were intimate, but not too intimate. It was a matter of asking those questions and letting his innermost self answer.

"Since doctors haven't found anything yet and they have no idea where your foot problems are coming from,
I would like to propose to them another approach, by using the language of organs, I often find a possible cause of diseases. Let's look at it another way. Their feet hurt, so their roots hurt, and no matter what they do, they hurt. Right?" As he listened devoutly and I massaged his feet, I felt him relax. "Good, I'm going to teach them something that my gut says they understand what I mean. Just feel it yourself." He nodded and looked intently at my hands. His body remembered. Deeply, I took a breath.

"Do you feel uncomfortable where you live, not rooted? Had you taken steps, because you walk through life with your feet, where you thought these ways, decisions were wrong or you should have taken other steps to be able to live better and more relaxed? Rooting therefore the feet in the case means to be in the here and now. Didn't and don't they have consistency, a family that demands a lot from them, no resting place for themselves and do they run around a lot?"

Bingo, the corners of his mouth twitched and his eyes smiled a little.
"Hmm, how do they know that? They're right about everything they just said. I'm thinking about my whole life right now. It was and is like that with me. What do you do when you can't get out of this problem, this predicament? Do I have to go through the middle and just stay here?" he asked haltingly.
He looked genuinely distressed, with a hint of relief mixed in with that distress.

"Maybe that's why you're in so much pain, so they'll stay here and not go back? Their feet don't want to carry them back. Their body has followed their soul. So if moving forward is no longer possible, and that has been communicated through their feet for years, then I would translate that quite simply as staying inside. Pain forces a person to look. My hint, with you it could be about mother, relationship or sexuality, because in the lumbar area a very big tension is felt and also a kind of support protection. It could be that if they continue to ignore that, sooner or later they will have a herniated disc."

His big eyes looked at me, startled.
"How can you feel that? I've had two herniated discs and two surgeries for them. The spine is broken, too." Wonderful. Now I couldn't get out of my amazement! Two surgeries in the same place and his spine was "broken"? Why didn't this person realize that he was living against his feelings? What should I say to him, his body spoke already very clearly and announced itself more and more and he? Was apparently waiting for it to really crack?

"Your spine reflects your inner attitude.
Do you know that? With them their life is probably not in the flow. You know, your back also represents the past. Apparently, like a donkey, they load up everything, or too much?" With a long sigh, he interrupted his listening. "Well my past seems to have been not so great and actually I had planned it nicer."
One look into his eyes was enough for me to see what he was feeling.

It seemed to me as if he suddenly saw a different life than the one he thought it had been. "And?" he asked. Do you think there's any hope for me?"  "Young man, the only thing that will help you is to make a conscious decision to give your life a new direction. To take different steps, to walk through a different door, to see what is new behind it. It may be that you fall into a hole. So what, everybody gets out. Does that make you think?"

"Well, it's not like I haven't been thinking about my life, when I've been really fucked up. Right now it's difficult." It would have been easier to keep quiet from now on, but I still had 7 minutes. "Is that why it's difficult, because you're someone who wants to please everyone?" I heard his answer even before he spoke it. "Yes, I am."

"Are they possibly bad at setting boundaries? Do you find that easy or difficult?" "Difficult for me." "What prevents you from changing something?" "Well, I fought hard for everything, so of course it's difficult to change direction. You have a family, and with all the people around you, it's difficult. Maybe I think they all need me, or I can't do without them." "Oh?" I say, "often when people think that others need them, it is rather the other way around. It's a cry of I want to be needed and seen. Can you do something with that?"

At that moment he looked infinitely sad and lost.
Suddenly getting a new look at his behavior, his life, was visibly not easy for him. He nods. I would have loved to hug him now, but I refrained from doing so. Instead, I gave him some advice: "What you need, I think, is just some time and some trust. As an immediate solution I recommend, without you having to decide right away, an easy thing: family constellation. Try something simple, you have to change something, otherwise you won't get rid of your foot pain."

The time was up.
Slowly I lowered the couch so that he could stand up. As he stood in front of me he looked a little wobbly on his feet, but he seemed happier. "Thank you," he almost whispers and took my offered hand. I feel myself honestly rejoicing at that small word.
"You know, they were with me to have their own story told and to get the impetus that they should and can make a difference. They got impulses about their feet and about words, try to do something with it. It's their chance for new steps in their lives."

He opened the door.
"You see, I say to him, they are going out through the same door. And yet, they could go left or right now. The way they came or just a new one." With a look that radiated gratitude and a hopeful smile, he replies:

"I thank life that I was allowed to meet you, these 25 min were worth it."

In the SPA on Mein Schiff II in August 2013

You can also find his feedback in the references:

Jörg (Saturday, 15 March 2014 19:37)

Hoi Ginger,
Somehow my thanks was not saved in August. Well then I thank you now again :-) I was in Aug. 2013 on my ship 2 and have enjoyed a wonderful, perfect massage, especially since a great conversation had taken place. Thanks for the inspiration that had actually changed about. Can't say what happened except that I left as a "different person".

Merci and best regards from Switzerland
Jörg